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It’s Vince McMahon appreciation night as well as being the draft pick! Here’s how it works - wrestlers from different shows will go up against each other. Whichever one wins, that’s who gets a draft pick to their team. Sounds simple, right?

Jerry and JR are commenting for Raw
John Bradshaw Layfield and Michael Cole are commenting for Smackdown
Tazz and Joey Styles are commenting for ECW. The gang’s all here!

Match #1: John Cena (Raw) VS Edge (Smackdown)

Cena starts with the upperhand until Edge outhinks Cena by side-stepping. Throwing lefts and rights to Cena until he finally kicks him out of the ring. Cena sunset flips inside the ring for a 2 count on Edge. Edge goes for a spear and misses - Cena goes for an FU from the steel steps but Edge rakes the eyes of Cena and quickly enters the ring before the bell tolls.

WINNER: Edge by count out

Draft Pick - The Great Khali’s going to Smackdown!

Jesse “The Body” Ventura comes on and says that Vince is a dictator and that dictators fall.

Match #2: CM Punk (ECW) VS Carlito (RAW)

Carlito starts off with a smack to Punk, and Punk returns the favor with a kick to the face. Punk gets Carlito into a fireman’s carry and lifts him off to a knee to the face for the count.

WINNER: CM Punk

Draft Pick: The Boogeyman drafted to ECW

Snoop Dog comes on and says that Vince is the greatest asshole of the world!

Mick Foley comes out and says that he will be a part of the open WWE Championship Match at Vengence. (Yay! Foley!)

Match #3: Balls Mahoney (ECW) VS Umaga (RAW)

Umaga superkicks Mahoney and knocks him down. He picks up his “balls” and gives Mahoney the Samoan Spike for the count.

WINNER: Umaga

Draft Pick: King Booker drafted to Raw w/ Queen Sharmell to accompany him

Match #4: Bobby Lashley (ECW) VS Chris Benoit (RAW)

Good match - both going old school. Benoit gets Lashley into the cross face as Lashley grabs onto the ropes. Benoit gets Lashley into 3 german suplex’s, then applies the sharpshooter, but Lashley brakes the hold and gets Benoit into a scoop powerslam for the count.

WINNER: Bobby Lashley

Draft Pick: Chris Benoit drafted to ECW!

Donald Trump comes out and says that Vince is pathetic. The Fabulous Moolah and Mae Young come out in lingerie and, as a tribute, bark like dogs! Superfly Jimmy Snooka and the Iron Shiek make their feelings known about how bad they think Vince is.

Match #5: MVP (Smackdown) VS Santino Marella (RAW)

Please - Marella telegraphs all of his moves and is not ready for primetime.

WINNER: MVP

Draft Pick: JBL is made a happy man when Torrie is drafted to Smackdown.

Bret Hart! Bret Hart says that the only way to show Vince appreciation is by a couple of fists to the face!

Match #6: The Miz (Smackdown) VS Snitzky (ECW)

Snitzky uses his raw power to overcome the Miz. He does a nice running clothes line straight at the Miz for the win.

WINNER: Snitzky

Uh oh - Snitzky gets a little too enthusiastic when beating up the Miz after the match is called and the ref reverses the decision!

WINNER: The Miz

Draft Pick: Chris Masters heading to Smackdown

Rowdy Roddy Piper shows some great moments of people slamming Vince - including some of the all-time favorites of Steve Austin!

Match #7: Candice Michelle (RAW) VS Kristal (Smackdown)

TNA - Kristal takes what she can of Michelle, but Michelle hits Kirstal with a spinning heel kick for the win.

WINNER: Candice Michelle

Draft Pick: Bobby Lashley drafted to RAW!

Coach comes out and tells Lashley that, as he is not on the Raw roster, he can not have the ECW championship belt. Lashley reluctantly gives it up and says that he’ll prove that he’s still the champ on Raw.

Match #8: Jeff Hardy (RAW) VS Elijah Burke (ECW) VS Batista (Smackdown)

Burke takes to the outside leaving Batista and Jeff going at it. Jeff gets a reverse spinning kick off the ropes with a swanton for a near fall which gets interrupted by Burke. Jeff’s down and Batista gets Burke into a Batista Bomb for the win.

WINNER: Batista

Draft Pick: Ric Flair heading to Smackdown

Captain Lou Albino says how much of an idiot Vince is.

Dusty Rhodes comes out and says that like him or not, you have to respect Vince.

Mene Gene Okerlund says that Vince gave him his biggest break - by firing him so that he could work for WCW.

15 MAN MATCH

Matt Hardy, Chris Masters, Mark Henry, William Regal and Chavo Guerrero (Team Smackdown)

Kevin Thorn, Matt Stryker, Tommy Dreamer, Sandman, Marcus Corvon (Team ECW)

Randy Orton, Viscera, Johnny Nitro, Ken Dystra and Eugene (Team RAW)

A straight pandemonium Battle Royale. Mark Henry eliminates Viscera by throwing him over the top rope. Eventually only two men stand - Randy Orton and Matt Hardy. Unfortunately, Orton picks up Hardy and tosses him to the floor below.

WINNER: Randy Orton

Draft Pick: Snitzky drafted to Raw.

Stone Cold Steve Austin comes on screen and says it comes down to Vince being a lying sack of shit, and that’s the bottom line cause SCSS.

Vince comes out for some closing thoughts. Picks up the mic and says “Thank you”. Walks aimlessly around out back until Coachman directs him to his limo. He walks outside to get a breath of fresh air and heads to his limo. He gets into the limo, closes the door and the limo bursts into flames!

RAW, ECW, Smackdown

On Monday Night Raw, Timbaland unveiled his new music video, “Throw It On Me”, starring the Diva’s. It will be playing again on Friday night Smackdown. Man - look what WWE has come to. Click to increase your T&A experience.

Friday Night Smackdown from Baltimore, Maryland!

Match #1: Matt Hardy VS MVP

Jeff isn’t with Matt tonight, and for some reason, Matt always wrestles differently without his trusty side-kick. It almost seemed as if Matt was playing it up for MVP’s benefit - possibly to boost the anticipation to Judgement Day? In a last ditch effort, Matt gets MVP in a bulldog from the corner post and drops a huge elbow. MVP windw up locking Hardy up in the Play Maker in the corner for the count.

WINNER: MVP

MVP says in a quick interview in the ring that he will not beat Benoit once in the match on Judgement Day - he will beat him twice to become the New United States Champion.

I saw nothing too amazing in MVP’s wrestling - Hardy played it up great, though.

Match #2: Deuce & Domino w/ Cherry and Chavo Guerrero VS Brian Kendrick, Paul London and Jimmy Wang Yang

6-Man tag team match

Kendrich and London totally working together as a solid tag team (they should be re-named Londrick). As one moves, the other simulatneously thinks and reacts. I have no seen a tag team that is so unified (other than the Hardys) in a long time. Jimmy Wang Yang gives a beautifuli moonsault off the top rope onto Chavo for the count.

WINNER: Londrick and Yang

Yang looked like he was right at home wrestling with the boys, but how many times do they have to wrestle the “Fonz” boys before we see them wrestle someone else?!

Match #3: Mark Henry VS Funaki

Funaki does not seem too impressed with Mark Henry (the world’s strongest man), but Henry lets him know exactly who he is. A huge head butt from Henry to Funaki with Fuanki ending up on the canvas. A final effort from Funaki - he jumps up onto the top rope and jumps off, but Henry caught him mid-air and power slammed him onto the mat for the 1-2-3.

WINNER: Mark Henry

Match #4: Chris Benoit VS Finlay

Finlay start out trash talking Benoit, but Benoit returns the favor with a slap to the face and starts going onto Finlay. Finlay heads after Benoit’s knee, hoping to get the uper hand. He applies pressure to the knee by putting him in teh single leg Boston crab. Benoit counters and gets Finlay into two German Suplex’s. Hornswaggle jumps up from under the rope to distract Benoit. Finlay grabs the Shilaleigh, but Benoit counters with a crippler cross face. Just bevore Finlay submits, MVP enters the ring and Benoit lets go of the submission hold to attack MVP. Finlay grabs the Sheileigh and hits Benoit on his injured leg, knocking him down. Finlay heads off and leaves Benoit for MVP. MVP beats Benoit motionless as a message for Judgement Day.

WINNER: A broken Benoit by disqualification.

Ashley announces “The Prince Of Darkness” - Ozzy Osbourne has finally come to Smackdown! He performed “I Don’t Wanna Stop” from his new Black Rain Album.

Match #5: The Miz VS Christian York

Miz takes control of York (who the hell is Christian York?) and throws York into the corner rope. He runs towards the rope and clotheslines York into the rope. He throws York down for a count and gets to 2 before he grabs him back up and gives him a swinging neck breaker for the count.

WINNER: The Miz

A total waste of five minutes.

Match #6: Kane VS William Regal w/ Dave Taylor

The Boogeyman and Little Boogeyman show up in the corner of Kane, with a smile on their faces.

Regal attacks Kane with numerous lefts to the head and a right boot to the face. Regal puts a boot on Kane’s chest and gets him in the corner, delivering numerous rights and lefts to the head of Kane. Kane chops Regal and Regal goes flying away from Kane. Kane sidewalk slams Regal onto the Matt and goes for a hammer punch - DOWN goes Regal.

Dave Taylor grabs Little Boogeyman and throws him into the ring. As Little Boogeyman runs past Regal, Kane grabs Regal by the neck for a chokeslam from Hell for 1-2-3.

WINNER: Kane
Edge comes out for his “Inaugural Address” and states the HE is the Heavyweight Champion to the crowd chanting “You SUCK!”. Edge tells the crowd that he will take all comers. Teddy Long holds him to that and says that he will take Batista on Judgement Day. Edge replies that he wants Batista, anytime, any place. Batista’s music plays and “the animal” walks to the ring dressed in a suit and shades. Batista “welcomes” Edge to Smackdown and says that he will do to Edge as he did to the Undertaker.

“That belt belong to me and I WILL be taking it back.”

Smackdown closes as Batista and Edge are in the ring looking eye to eye.

Smackdown, Smackdown results, Batista, Edge, Hardy boys, Undertaker, Kane, Ozzy Osbourne

Funk’s Corner - Support the Troops

We are proud of our military and support our troops around the world. Five of our regulars at the Funking Conservatory are US Military.

Our Funking Conservatory World Champion Johnny Magnum has served on two trips to Iraq and once in Afghanistan. Johnny’s wife Sandy is also retired from the US Army.

Flynn’ Ryan “Air” Mitchell is currently serving in the US Navy and so is his wife and In Ring Valet, Sandii Skye.

Our Hardcore Champion, Shane Chung is currently serving in the US Navy stationed in South Carolina and commuting to the Funking Conservatory. Shane also has served in Iraq.

My Father, Dory Funk Sr. served in the US Navy in World War II as a Boatswain’s Mate aboard LSM 182 in the South Pacific.

All of our shows carry the initial “Support the Troops” logo plus number identification and name of the show.

Support the Troops 16 comes to the Funking Conservatory Sunday May 27th Johnny Magnum defending his Florida Championship against Shane Chung with Gail Kim in Shane’s Corner.

Scott D’Amore will have Father James Mitchell in his corner when He returns to !BANG! TV against myself, Dory Funk Jr. in a Revenge Match.

Gail Kim, The Claw, Claudia Reiff and The Pop Tarts, Miss Vicki and Lady Kimberly will be in a four girl tournament for the Funking Conservatory’s Women’s Championship.

Flyin’ Ryan “Air” Mitchell will have Sandii Skye in his corner as he faces Elvis Sharp, Kory Chavis and Blain Rage in a four way Number 1 Contender’s Match winner to face Shane Chung for the Hardcore Championship next month.

Interviews, Webbies and Videos for Support the Troops 16, “Ultimate Struggle” and much more is on our website at www.dory-funk.com.

If you would like to become a professional wrestler and appear on !BANG! TV with only three weeks of training call 352-895-4658

It is being bandied around that WWE is trying to get Ozzie Osbourne to appear on next week’s Smackdown. Wierd - that should be interesting.

It has now been confirmed that the reason Mr. Kennedy lost the Money in the Bank briefcase is because he has a very serious tear in his triceps. Wrestlers were said to be shocked that he was able to hold the briefcase over his head on Monday night. Dr’s. estimate that he will be out of comission for at least 5-7 months.

New rumors are circulating that both Edge and Orton will be transferred to the Smackdown brand to cover for Mr. Kennedy and The Undertaker leaving.

The Undertaker, Mr. Kennedy, Edge, WWE, Orton, Ozzie Osbourne